Managing your anger during times of crisis

When a crisis occurs, you may feel a mix of emotions. Dire events like natural disasters, financial upheavals, and public health emergencies can leave you feeling uncertain, sad, stressed—and angry.

Anger is a normal reaction to abnormal circumstances says Bethany Teachman, PhD, a clinical psychologist and professor of psychology at the University of Virginia. It’s a response to the event itself, and to the way the event changes your life. You may not sleep or eat well. You may worry about your finances or your family’s well-being. This can make it easier to tip over into anger.

In less-fraught times, you might deal with negative emotions by going for a run or taking a trip. But when events prevent you from using your usual coping strategies, it’s easy to become frustrated or annoyed. These feelings can sometimes become displaced. You may become angry at your child for playing her music too loudly, or angry with your spouse for leaving wet towels on the bathroom floor.

Strategies for managing anger during a stressful event

If you’re concerned about your own growing feelings of anger, there are two sets of strategies for dealing with it. “There are preventative things you can do to keep yourself from being overwhelmed by anger so often,” says Teachman. “But if you do become angry, there are also strategies for how to manage that situation more effectively.” Here are some strategies to consider for preventing anger.

Stick to a regular routine

Day-to-day schedules can become disrupted during difficult times. It can put a strain on you both mentally and physically, says Teachman. One way to mitigate the effects of this disarray is to maintain your normal schedule as much as possible.

“It’s important to eat regular meals, get a full night’s sleep, and find time to exercise,” Teachman says. Prioritizing sleep is essential. Research shows that losing even a couple hours of sleep can lead to increased feelings of anger.

Practice mindfulness

Setting aside a few minutes each day to practice mindfulness or meditation can also help dial down your irritation. One 2024 analysis of 154 studies published in Clinical Psychology Review found that mindfulness effectively helped to lessen anger in multiple ways. It reduced arousal and heart activity, such as heart rate and blood pressure, and promoted a sense of connection and empathy.

Limit your news intake

When you’re stuck at home watching a barrage of upsetting news, it can contribute to tension, anxiety, and a sense of constant urgency.

That doesn’t mean you should ignore what’s going on in the world. But in many cases, it’s healthy to limit your media exposure to certain times of day. Teachman suggests you choose a half hour in the morning, and then a half hour before or after dinner to watch a trusted news channel. Avoid using the TV for background noise. Shut off all news at least an hour before bedtime, so as not to disturb your sleep.

Give yourself space

Finding personal space to reflect can take creativity during hard times. But it’s crucial to decompress and keep your anger from building, says Teachman. She suggests scheduling daily times to retreat to a private space or simply having “quiet hours” when no conversation is required. If you don’t have extra rooms at home, create a virtual cocoon by listening to music or a podcast on headphones.

Put activities on the calendar

Tension can build when you communicate with others mostly about practical things like chores and schedules. So, if the situation allows, plan leisure time. Play a game or have a video call with nothing on the agenda except relaxing and talking.

Positive interactions can build good will and understanding, Teachman says. “That makes it easier for everyone to let it go next time someone makes a comment the others don’t like.”

What to do when you start to lose your cool

Even with putting all the above strategies into place, you may still have moments when your blood starts boiling. Here’s what to do when you feel the anger building.

Recognize the signs

When your brain is triggered to anger, your body responds physically: Your heart starts racing, your palms sweat, your muscles tense, or you find yourself breathing a little heavier. “Pay attention to what your physical reactions are and use these as a sign that you need to take a break from the situation, whether that means going outside for fresh air, or retreating to your headphones,” Teachman says.

Don’t react in the moment

Scheduling appointments to work out difficult situations is more productive—and less explosive—than reacting in the moment, Teachman advises. “If you're upset with your teenager about all the noise he’s making playing video games, tell him, ‘I'd like to think about how we're going to manage this situation. Let’s sit down after dinner tonight and work out how we can deal with it.’” That way, says Teachman, you can both have some time to cool down and prepare for the conversation in a positive way, rather than overreacting in the moment that you’re most upset.

Adjust your perspective

One method that can stop your anger in its tracks is to take a moment to see the situation from the other person’s point of view, Teachman says. For example, if you’re angry that someone cut ahead of you in line at the pharmacy, consider this: Perhaps they were distracted by a sick child at home and didn’t realize that you were already waiting to pay. Whether or not your scenario is true, it gives your brain another angle on the situation and may help you manage your feelings more effectively.

Finally, if you’ve tried all these methods, and you’re still worried that you can’t control your anger, seek outside help. Many therapists and clinics offer virtual appointments and other telehealth services. You can also find listings for doctors in your area through Sharecare’s search tool or call your insurance company for referrals. Listings can also be found via the American Psychological Association’s psychologist locator.

There are also many options for online cognitive behavioral therapy, which has been shown in many studies to be an effective and affordable alternative to in-person therapy.